Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Former Position

Monday, March 27, 2006
They are so lucky. Current mood: amused Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
That AT&T has not come up with a way for me to reach through the phone and ring someone's neck.
I am so over leasing this space next to Urban Outfitters.
And now we return to: Stupid People Should Be Sent To Their Own Island and Sterilized.
***Phone ringing
Me: "This Is Cheapshot Von Picklebottom Hotbuns"
Caller: "Yes I was calling about the church for lease in Clifton."
Me: "Well the former Coldstone Creamery, 1243 s.f is available for $45 per s.f. NET at a five year term."
Caller: "How big is 1243 square feet?"
Me: "Um, well, 1243 square ft.. What?"
Caller: "Is it the whole church?"
Me: "Oh no. Urban Outfitters has about 8000 of the total there and Clifton Heights Community Improvement has about, 2000."
Caller: "So, are those businesses?"
Me: "Um, yup...?"
Caller: "But it is a church?"
Me: "Um, yeah, it used to be, then we bought the structure and re-habbed it, then we leased it out as retail.." ****getting really curious at to just where this is going to go****
Caller: "Do you feel that is right?"
Me: "Do I feel what's right? I don't understand?"
Caller: "To desicrate a house of the Lord?"
Me:"Oh, I see....Well, we here at JRARE joined a Satanic Cult about 9 years ago in summer of 1997. In the practices and teachings of the almighty Beelzabub, we have learned that the best way to smite the Holy Father and his son JC, is with hip Urban Wear, Kicky Suede Sneakers, Kitsch and Designer Jeans.....It pleases the Dark Lord....Any other questions?"


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