Sunday, December 28, 2008
It was a cool and crisp evening, with gay excitement in the air, as we left the local tavern with nary a care. As Father and I retired to our chamber after an evening of making merry, I was awakened in the middle of the night by something drippy, round and cherry! "What ever could this be?" I exclaimed while putting on my clothes, I turned on the light, looked into the mirror and HORRORS!
IT TWAS MY NOSE!
It was throbbing like the heart of young love in the throes of passion, as liquids poured through my nostrils, dripping onto my nightly fashions... My sinuses were a flaming whilst my head ached and throbbed with pain... My body was limp and listless, as if it twas pummeled by a train...
Oh love of lordes of light? What hath I done to deserve such a fright? How will I even awake, yet attend to my holiday duties? I cannot be expected to perform with a body riddled with gunk and reeking of cooties!
As I cursed my misfortune as I came to accept this nuisance, I heard the soft jingle of bells way off into the distance... While drawing back the covers and switching off the lights, I heard a man exclaim "Merry Sickmas to all and to all a shitty night!"