Monday, July 19, 2010

Ten Reasons to Change Your Blog Name, Even Though It will Mess Up Your Pretend Readership.

10. After reviewing your site meter details, it dawns on you that the hits from Sri Lanka are most likely not people who are interested in your clever reminiscing about groundhogs.

09. The name of your blog makes family reunions a little awkward.

08. It's a ding to your self-esteem when other, unfunny, very poorly named bloggers constantly harp "WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN" when referring to your blog's name. Is it really that confusing? It makes more sense than condiment pastries.

07. You get tired of strangers questioning your AWESOME sex life..... and then you feel forced to naively mention your sex life ON THE INTERNET. GAH!

06. The really clever new name for you blog brings the image of white robes and David Duke to your readership, which then makes you awkwardly defend yourself and how you're not racist and you really DO have black friends.

05. Nobody wants to talk about Dildos at work functions... No matter how many complimentary cocktails have been consumed.

04. Did I mention the "being mistaken for a porn site?"

03. Change comes from within your soul, and my soul is without plastic penetrating party devices.

02. If your name isn't so offensive, you may actually make some money off of this freakin' blog for once... Doubtful, but maybe.

01. My Mom reads this. Lord knows my writing has enough objectionable content for my mom to chew on, let alone having to visit a website with "dildo" in the title. Hi Mom! Love you!



  1. Hilarious!

    I have been considering moving my blog, and the "pretend readership" really resonated!

  2. I think the Mayo issue has got to be the best argument.

  3. Ugh. I don't think that guy can suck any harder.

    Thanks, Brooke!